


Lethal Doses of Eren Yeager

by alittlewhitecat



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Crazy, Gross, I'm Not Ashamed, Inappropriate Humor, M/M, Multi, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Roommates, Sexual Humor, Toilet humor, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Weirdness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-22
Updated: 2016-12-17
Packaged: 2018-03-02 19:51:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 5,225
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2824055
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alittlewhitecat/pseuds/alittlewhitecat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"How are you this awake right now?" He said, already knowing the answer. </p><p>"I've always believed in a potentially lethal combination of Rockstars and 5-hour energy drinks," Eren smiled, and Levi did not just feel butterflies. No. This was Eren, who he'd punched in the face when they were ten and arguing over who peed in bed the most, and who, unlike what Hange kept insisting, he most definitely did not have a thing for.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Rockstars and 5 Hour Energy Drinks

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry i'm not sorry for all this shit HAHAHAHAHA :D. this ended up as just an outlet for all my toilet humor instead of the ERERII SMEX that it was supposed to be. i'll try to update daily! it WILL end up as ERERI SMEX i swear! i go back and fix stuff

_Was the kid high on something?_ Were the first words Levi thought upon starting their study session. Eren had enthusiastically started yammering about which chapters in the book they'd read, managed to bash through the mental walls he'd put up to avoid over-thinking anything at 8am in the god damn morning, and yet strangely, like always, managed to not completely piss Levi off. Yet. 

"How are you this awake right now?" He said, already knowing the answer. 

"I've always believed in a potentially lethal combination of Rockstars and 5-hour energy drinks," Eren smiled, and Levi did  _not_ just feel butterflies. No. This was _Eren,_ who he'd punched in the face when they were ten and arguing over who peed in bed the most, and who, unlike what Hange kept insisting, he most definitely  _did not_ have a thing for. 

"One day your shit for a brain is really gonna become shit," He flipped over the study guide. They were almost done. 

"Why does everything with you have to be about shit? Is that like, one of your kinks?" Eren was grinning. "Do you get off to the thought of Petra taking a shit or something?"

"Why would I get off to Petra taking a shit when we both share a bathroom, and I can listen to you taking one?" He raised an eyebrow, and snorted at the slight blush that came over his roommate's face.

Eren started laughing and buried his face in his hands. "Oh god. No. Now I can't ever go to the bathroom when you're there." 

"You'd deprive me of my one and only pleasure? And here I was thinking we were friends," Levi sighed.

"Wow, you guys get off on the weirdest things," Hange plopped in between them, startling them both. 

Levi turned. "The hell did you come from?"

"I was listening to your little shit-filled flirtation session and thinking you guys would have the prettiest babies," Hange sighed. "Did you know you can make a test tube baby with 2 dads now? They do this thing where they-"

"Our babies would come out with shit in their mouths if they resembled Levi in any way," Eren moaned, face still in his hands and shoulders still shaking. 

"And they'd have shit in their skulls because of you," Levi retorted. "...By the way, it was  _not_ a flirtation session."

Hange's eyebrows wiggled. "Was too."

"Shut up."

"Hey," Eren sat up, still laughing. "This is the last time I'm studying with you. Did we actually get anything done?"

"We did," Levi passed him the study guide. "We only have one topic left."

"...Eh. That one's easy, let's skip it. Did you two eat yet?"

"...I was actually going to go to the bathroom later and-"

Eren punched him in the arm and covered his mouth as the trio walked off to the communal kitchen.

"Damn brat," Levi said when he finally uncovered his mouth.

"You can't talk about your weird kinks when we're about to eat pancakes," Eren said, trying and failing to frown at him.

"But guys!" Hange pushed in between the two of them. "Did you know, it's actually very healthy to talk about these kinds of things to your partner when you're in a committed rel-"

"Shut up Hange!" They both clapped their hands over Hange's cackling mouth, who promptly bit them.

"Ow, shitty-glasses! I'm not making you any fucking pancakes."

"For once, I agree with grumpy mcgrumpy here," Eren rubbed at his thumb, wincing. 

"Aw come on guys, I didn't even bite that hard!"

They didn't relent.

"Okay fine, I'll be in charge of your test tube babies and make sure they don't come out with any shit. "

Levi turned very slowly to look at Hange, who gulped. 

"You  _will_ make sure they come out with shit in their mouths. Just not shit for brains."

Eren groaned. 


	2. 'Cause YOLOOOO and Shitty Pancakes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> on break and have way too much free time so UPDATES ALL DAY ERRY DAY.  
> i think there will be actual plot instead of mindless flirting and as always I publish then go back and proofreed myself because i do things the hard way mothafuckasssss

"This is unsanitary," Levi lifted up the... _thing_ that was apparently supposed to be pancakes up with his fork. "You managed to scrape off bits of the cooking pan  _into the damn pancake_ how on earth did you do that-"

"I'm sorry Levi!" Eren was trying and failing miserably to stop Hange and himself from laughing. "I just, I was trying to save the pancakes before the fire alarm went off, 'cuz that's what happened last time I cooked and there was too much smoke-"

"And you didn't mention this before?" He glared at Hange as well. "Hange you knew and you didn't stop him?! This is the last time I'm leaving you two alone unsupervised."

Hange started doing that damn eyebrow wiggling thing again. "Aw Levi, are you worried we'll be doing the hanky panky? Shovin' the plunger into the toilet?  _Clogging the pipes_ if you know what I mean?"

Eren started snorting.

Levi dumped the rest of the glob that was on his plate into the trash can. "Hange, your euphemisms are scarring and will give me nightmares for the rest of my life. " He started heading for the door. 

"No! Levi!!!" Eren moaned pitifully. "Don't leave me alone with Hange! My pipes will be clogged!"

Levi stopped. 

Hange smiled. "Aw, Eren, you sure you don't want me to clog you dirtier than a public restroom? I could make you leak that blue water everywhe-"

Levi grabbed Eren who stuck his tongue out at Hange, who waved goodbye in turn.

"And thus the marvelous porcelain throne went off with the dashing plumber, whose plunger size was the thing of legend!" Hange laughed dramatically after them to the bemused looks of the other students walking into the kitchen, as well as Moblit who Levi had seen approaching from far off (and used to make his getaway. No matter how insane Hange was, he wouldn't just ditch anyone like that). By now most of them were somewhat used to Hange's insanity and after saying good morning, asked if the glob on the plate was some kind of specimen Hange had stolen from the biology labs, again. 

"So." Eren grinned, and Levi did not like the look of that grin at all. "You'd rather shove  _your_ plunger into my pipes than Hange, hmm?"

Levi smirked back, studiously not thinking of how cute the stupid brat was, with his dumb bright eyes and messy hair. "Think you can handle it?" He leaned in, drew his roommate close to him, and whispered into Eren's ear. "It _is_ the size of legend, after all."

Inside, he laughed maniacally as he watched a blush start all the way from Eren's collarbones, up to his neck, and then his face. Damn brat was too cute for his own good. Okay, yeah, maybe Hange was right. Only a little. Eren was surprisingly muscular in  _all the right places_ and no shut up, gutter mind. 

But Eren had recovered, though still blushing, and leaned in close to Levi now, noses almost touching. "You should show me sometime," he murmured with a sultry grin and  _god damn it_ Levi did not just get a boner. Okay, Hange was more than a little right. No wait, he was probably just feeling particularly horny that day and Eren just happened to be the only semi-attractive person-male-god he didn't even really know his sexual preference at this point- in the room. He pictured Eren in his head, 12 years old, covered in dirt and sobbing with snot coming out of his nose because he'd beat and gotten beat up by Jean, and---well, there went his boner. See? Nothing to worry about. He did not have a thing for shitty brats. He pictured pretty, sweet, Petra in his head.

"God you guys, get a room." 

Mikasa was standing there with an unimpressed look on her face, and they both jumped away from each other. 

"Mika-er, we weren't-"

"We weren't flirt-"

They both tried to say at the same time, but she just sighed and shook her head. "Denial is an interesting place to be," she muttered to herself as she stalked off.

They looked at each other, mortified. "What's that supposed to mean?!" Eren called after her, but she didn't respond, and he looked at Levi, frustrated. 

"Bromance?" he offered, and Eren laughed, then suddenly checked the time.

"Shit, we have class in 15."

"That's because you took your own sweet time in trying to feed me poison and burn down the building."

"Fuck you."

He kept his expression completely deadpan. "I'm all yours tonight... _baby,"_  and Eren put his face in his hands and laughed.

"Noooo holy shit don't do that again, that was creepy as hell! Say something else!"

"...What, that didn't turn you on?" 

His friend shook his head, smiling. "What about doing a giraffe sound? Giraffes are pretty cool!"

"What the hell kind of sound does a giraffe make?"

"...I...actually have no idea, I always thought they'd sound like a cow or something."

"A cow, Yeager? You get turned on by cows?"

"No you idiot I do not get turned on by cows!"

A group of students walking along in the hallway burst out laughing at that, and that was the cue for Eren, face blushing red (again) to drag Levi off to class. 

"Why do I hang out with you guys?" He whined. "Now everyone in the dorm thinks we're all fucking lunatics. "

Levi used his deadpan expression again, and leaned slightly back while cupping his hands near his mouth to project. " 'Cause YOLOOOO," then straightened up as if nothing had happened. Hange had probably gotten to him. Damn stupid non-binary maniac.

"You...you're all fucking lunatics," Eren grinned. "But yeah, that's probably why."

 

 

 

 


	3. LOVE TRIANGLES and crazy ex's

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hahaha fuck i ship levi and petra too. err. LOVE TRIANGLES!!!! THEY'RE ALL SO (A)CUTE AHAHAHAHA ok i'll stop now but count on me being a complete loon who can't make up my mind
> 
> oh fuck there's levihan in here???? shit

Linear Algebra could choke on his shit, Levi decided halfway through class. The professor, once again, seemed to think that having anything remotely resembling English come out of his mouth was optional. At least his writing was semi-legible.

"Could you mumble some more please, I'm trying to practice my German," he muttered under his breath, and Eren elbowed him, although he did catch a smile on his face from the corner of his eye. Petra was sitting on his left side and she smiled ruefully at him under her hair. 

Petra. He'd met her the first day of college, as they lived on the same floor, and she was the first friend he'd made at the university. She was a pretty girl, with honey-colored eyes and hair, and it still kind of amazed him how wife-like she was. Shit. He wasn't stupid, there was that  _something_ between them that even Eren had picked up on. She brought him cupcakes when he was sick and he'd refrained from responding with ' _who the hell wants a cupcake when they have a 102 degree fever_ ' and had instead thanked her. He'd stopped using the word 'shit' around her. He could probably fall in love with her, have 20 little shits for kids with her and then because of his bullshit ways completely break her heart , feel like shit about it and then go on long drinking binges and get arrested for public indecency. Which had happened (the public indecency thing was a one time thing though) with everyone else he'd dated, even Hange. Why he'd ever dated Hange was beyond him, but...Hange's craziness actually went well with Levi's shitiness, and his ex-now-friend had always been crazy hot, before and after transitioning to their non-binary status. And crazy in every way. Why had they broken up? Oh right, because Levi genuinely cared about the maniac and didn't want to long-term relationship someone who made his heart race  _in all the wrong ways_ because they thought that setting up a nuclear weapons shop in the garage was a good idea, or that hey, Molotov cocktails aren't that dangerous to just carry around in your pocket because what if a UFO tried to kidnap me--Levi shook his head, he did not need to experience another mini heart attack. Hange had given him more than enough. Including the day they'd told him that they were actually non-binary and whoops, forgot to tell you but I just had my breasts removed! And then proceeded to rip open their shirt, cackling madly. With the bandages still on. (Sometimes he woke up dreaming about those marvelous D cups...gone forever now...)

He smiled back shakily at Petra, brushed back a strand of hair that had been sticking up from her headband, and they smiled at each other before she turned away to look at the board and attempt to make out the chicken scratch that used to be legible. Hange hadn't taken the breakup well but it hadn't been long before they started terrorizing the local LGBTQ community, and found Moblit, who Levi wholeheartedly thanked for calming down Hange's deranged-ness somewhat.

But anyway. There was Eren on his right, and he could have sworn the dumb idiot had been frowning at him and Petra before quickly turning away to look at the board as well. The dumb idiot who he'd grown up with, and now dormed with at college...Who kept leaving his filthy socks on the floor, and came in smelling like a pig farm from the gym, and was either totally oblivious to the fact that Levi probably actually did have a boner for his childhood friend or knew and was just fucking with him; knowing Eren, it could be either one...and who had somehow gotten nice tan skin. Really nice tan skin, actually, and those blue-green eyes, the slight upward slant of his nose and lips, and the sex-hair he always managed to sport even when there was no sexing to be found...

Fuck, he was checking Eren out again. He shook his head. No. He was not checking out Eren fucking Yeager. He'd walked in on him jacking off to tentacle anime porn, volume on high, last week, and had just turned around and walked back out (and of course he hadn't let Eren live that down yet). And he had  _not_ seen Eren's dick. Thank god for small miracles. But seriously, when the hell did Eren get so attractive? 

Eren had finally seemed to notice Levi glaring at him and wiggled his eyebrows in a very Hange-like manner. Levi gave him the middle finger (Petra wasn't looking) and Eren stuck out his tongue and tried to lick it.

"You're disgusting," Levi hissed quietly as he snatched his hand back.

Eren leaned in close to Levi's ear. "Oh Daddy, I love it when you talk dirty to me," and smiled that shit-eating grin Levi was sure Hange was completely responsible for. Eren's warm breath tickled as he then blew gently into his ear and  _no he was not going to shiver._

Scratch that. Eren totally fucking knew. He was fucking grinning at Levi with a challenge in his eyes.  _Where the hell did he learn this shit from._

Fine. If he wanted to play, then Levi could take it 2 steps further.

He stretched out his arm inconspicuously onto Eren's thigh, and began to slowly creep his hand inwards, brushing right over his dick a couple of times, and feeling his roommate try desperately not to move. His grin grew larger as he felt the bulge grow. 

"There's more where that came from," he whispered into Eren's ear, and his friend was now red faced and torn between anger and arousal. Levi smilied back the same shit-eating grin Eren had given him. 

The sound of people stuffing shit into their backpacks signaled the end of the class.

"Levi, want to work on the homework now?" Petra was smiling at him and hadn't seen any of the exchange between himself and Yeager, who was very studiously looking at his notes in an attempt to get his dick to calm down and stop blushing. Dumb idiot blushed too much too.

"Sure," He smiled back. "Oh, and, Eren? That last problem, I'll help you with it when I get back." He smirked at Eren in a way that said,  _yes, I know exactly what problem I'm talking about._ "Have fun in Chem class with Hange."

Eren glared at him (or tried to, really) and flipped him off as he left. 

Petra laughed. "You guys get along so well."

Levi was going to be in so much trouble when he got back.


	4. eren pov i hate naming fuckin titles

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> err i started thinking of my own story and original characters so...i'm gonna just work on the two simultaneously and link you all to the other project when it's ready. graaa it's tiring remembering that Levi is supposed to be Levi and Eren isn't supposed to be the original character i came up with. fuckin dickweasels crawlin up my urethra

"I'm gonna kill that dick," Eren glared at whatever lab experiment he and Hange were working on. "Hange, he...he molested me! How can you let that monster take away my innocence just like that?!"

Hange barely looked up. "Replace 'kill' with 'fuck' and also, what innocence? I'm pretty sure he walked in on you last week watching tentacle por-"

"Shut up!" He hissed, and Hange heehee'd. "Why do you know that, anyway? Wait-- how many people did he tell?!"

His lab partner was looking intently at the beaker they were holding. "He only told me because he wanted help to make all your fantasies come true. Himself. Ooooh actually Levi would look really good with tentacles instead of a di-"

"Nooo," Eren moaned. But Hange was Hange and continued spewing nightmares from their mouth, still staring intently at the chemicals in their hand, and...weren't they done with the experiment already?

"-ck, you know, I really think with the current technology you could theoretically cut away the foreskin heheheh and with a very fresh tentacle specimen redirect all the nerve endings--"

"What are you doing?!" Eren exclaimed as quietly as he could. He didn't need any more attention on them. 

"What?" Hange finally looked up. "...Dumbbutt, I'm explaining to you why it's possible to replace your dick with-"

"No you maniac! I just saw you slip those chemicals into your pocket! What the hell do you need that much Hydrogen Peroxide for?!" Eren was thinking quickly. Hydrogen Peroxide's most volatile uses were as rocket propellant, or as an explosive, and not to mention, he'd seen Hange slip in to the back and come out with suspiciously bulging pockets.

Hange whipped out their crazy eyes and mashed their hands on Eren's cheeks. "It's in the name of SCIENCE! I had to take matters into my own hands! They wouldn't let me test out my hypothesis of a better way to make explosives!!!!" 

"Why the hell would they let you make explosives?! Why the fuck do you even _want_ to make explosives?!"

"Why  _wouldn't_ you want to make explosives?!"

"You're a lunatic! What is wrong with you?!"

"You'll see who's laughing when you find out you need mach 20 bombs and have nowhere to turn!" 

"Yeah, 'cuz the only person I'd ever need them for is you!"

"Quiet," The professor drawled out from her desk, and that was when Eren and Hange realized that the whole of their Chem lab class was now staring at them.

"Godammit Hange," he muttered. 


	5. sssssatan!!!!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> in this chapter, we are all petra.

Levi had a very bad feeling about this. There seemed to be some kind of...malevolent aura emanating from his dorm room, and he almost wanted to turn back and go hang out with Petra. Almost. 

He fished out a sheet of paper and drew a large pentagram on it. He spent a few moments holding it up to his door and looking critically at his work, when Mikasa came up.

"...I was going to ask you what you were doing, but I don't think I will anymore."

"Do you think this will repel demons?"

She stared at him.

"...There's an evil force that could possibly be satanic, inside my room right now," He offered by way of explanation.

Her expression turned pitying. "You poor thing. Hange has finally gotten to you."

Eren threw open the door. "Fuck you Levi! And fuck Hange!...Oh thanks Mikasa!" Mikasa had wordlessly handed him a cup of hot chocolate, which he drank and then set down on the floor.

"Well, I'll leave you two then. Try not to break the bed."

"Oh, we'll break more than the bed," Levi smirked. "Right, sugar tits?" Eren once again looked torn between anger and wanting to fuck the shit out of him. Haha, fuck the shit outta hi-

Eren had grabbed him by the neck and had pulled him closer. Shitty brat was taller than him. "I'll break your dick off," he said sultrily. "And then I'll fuck you up so hard your asshole turns inside out--" His breath hitched. 

Levi had slipped a hand up his shirt and was now exploring the very muscular and hard terrain that was the chest of Eren Yeager. "What was that?" He murmured, dragging his nails lightly down his roommate's torso. "I couldn't hear you over the sound of my dick cumming mach 20."

Eren's eyebrow twitched. Oh yes, Hange had told him what had happened during Chem class. In response, he grabbed hold of Levi's hips  _mmm his hands on him_ and ground his own against Levi's.  _Shit_ yep that was Levi's boner. And Levi could feel the warmth spread across his face. Goddammit. At least Eren was also blushing. 

Eren's head dipped down to Levi's ear, where he  _did that fucking blowing thing_ again and Levi only got harder in response. "I'll make you cum harder than mach 20." And then the little shit _fucking_   _nibbled_ on his ear. 

"I-is that so?" Levi panted and found he couldn't look Eren in the eye and was trying and failing to get out of the tight embrace. He hated blushing. Eren was all muscles and felt _so good_ against him, and his arms were only tightening around him--he had to calm down before he could form words."You'll have to take care of a...problem first." And he ground against Eren's growing bulge. Shit. The little shit was reducing him to a puddle of goo. 

Eren's hands slipped down to his ass and he  _squeezed. "_ Only if you're a good boy."

Levi's mouth was now very dry, and he leaned up to Eren's mouth, breathing shallowly on them for a moment, and Eren stared back at him, mesmerized. "But I've been such a  _very, very bad boy...Daddy_." He pitched the last word out low, and Eren's eyes widened.

They heard a gasp to their left, and Levi turned to see a very red, very blushing Petra there. 

"I..." She fanned herself frantically. "I...oh my, that was...haha, you..."

Levi sighed. "...You're gonna masturbate to this later, aren't you?"

Petra nearly fainted. "I...m-m-mayb...Eek!" And ran off. 

Levi pushed Eren back into the room and locked the door.

 


	6. dead baby sharks

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> They diddled each other in the bunghole and Levi shit everywhere and fed it to Eren-
> 
> HAHAHA JUST KIDDING. also comments are love. they make my day. i love all of you.

They fell on the floor, with Levi landing on top of Eren, and the two gazed into each other's eyes deeply. Levi was blushing pink like rose petals in the spring, and Eren's arms kept the beautiful  ~~damsel~~ man from escaping his grasp. 

"My noble steed," Levi purred.

"My shitty little darling," Eren whispered throatily in a high falsetto. The two leaned in and--

\--burst out laughing. 

"You fuck, you just had to ruin the moment by asking Petra if she was gonna masturbate, do you know how much I  _did not_ need that imagery?! Vaginas are scary, they're like _endless holes_ and what if she hid those dead baby shark jars they keep in the biology hall in there, and then the glass shattered and she gave birth to a dead baby shark LEVI STOP LAUGHING honestly you're like Satan incarnate," He pouted. "Why don't you go eat your own shit and go to Petra and her dead baby sharks or something," Eren tried to get Levi off of him, but Levi was surprisingly good at being deadweight, and eventually Eren sighed and flopped back down.

"If I'm Satan incarnate, then my shit would be hot as hell," Levi whispered seductively, leaning towards Eren. "Right?"

Eren gulped. "Uh...R-right...So?"

"So I could give you a nice, warm, cleveland steamer-"

"NOOO!!" Eren lept up and sent Levi sprawling to the floor. "What the fuck?! How can you just deflate my hard-on so quickly??How can you  _give_ me hard-ons so easily, what the fuck, I'm cursed, I'm so sorry dead baby sharks, oh god it's because of Hange right?!" He pulled Levi up into a tight embrace. "Hange did this to you; my poor Levi, I swear I'll rescue you somehow; I swear I'll get you back--" He started nuzzling Levi's neck and petting him, and  _god damn_ Levi would never admit it but he was actually enjoying being petted. But only by Eren. "Poor Levi...mmm...smells good..."

Then the little fucker started  _leaving little kisses on Levi's neck_ and Levi  _knew_ Eren had felt his heartbeat skyrocket. 

"Oi," Levi gasped when the piece of shit started  _sucking._ "Q-quit it!"

Eren didn't pause. "Or what?" He murmured against the shorter man's skin, and damn if those vibrations didn't feel like sin. "You're gonna stop me?" He tightened his hold on Levi, and Levi hadn't realized his own arms had wrapped around Eren and were wandering around his roommate's body until the other man smiled against his neck.

"You," Levi gritted his teeth and tried to concentrate. Eren had just  _licked_ up Levi's neck and he couldn't control the small moan that escaped him. The blood was starting to rush into his ears and he was hyper-aware now of how heavenly it felt to be pressed up against Eren. 

He'd always had a very strict 'Don't screw your housemates or your friends' rule after the Hange debacle, but...

Honestly, he'd set himself up for this one. Although they were childhood friends, they didn't hang around or see each other much at all until they'd found out they were going to the same college, and when he actually came face to face with Eren it was far too late. 

Fuck.

He shoved Eren down and leaned over him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i actually am a proud owner of a vagina and I SO FUCKING WOULD put a dead baby shark in there. AND THEN I WOULD NAME IT WALLY


	7. Comeback

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> uh i just realized I have an inbox with people askjng me to update so here. Longest comeback ever fuck yeah!
> 
> Idk if this is the end but probably yeah as i'm not into aot much these days~ also i'm graduating uni this yr so busy busy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NSFW

"It's probably too late to talk about this right now," Levi grinned down at Eren. "What will become of us and all."

The teal-eyed boy blinked. "Couldn't we have a serious conversation with your dick in my mouth?"

 The room was getting warm.

And Levi leaned down and kissed him. 

Eren's lips were soft and warm, and it was a chaste kiss at first. Eren smelled good. Levi was melting into Eren, and their breaths were mingling, and they stayed like that for what seemed like an eternity. If this was what Heaven was like, then Heaven was a glorious thing, but it was also getting real fucking boring.

Eren finally growled and flipped them over.

"Wha-" Levi had had the air rushed out of him.

"I'm gonna fuck you," Eren looked down at him lovingly, words at odds with his gaze, and Levi shivered. "And you're gonna  _take it and beg me for more._ _"_

Levi's eyes were as wide as saucers, and Eren pulled him up by his shirt and gave him a deep, laughing kiss. 

It soon became frenzied. Eren was sucking at his lips, their teeth were knocking together and Levi could only make pained moans against his mouth as Eren bit down hard enough to draw blood and palmed his dick. Levi wanted his pants  _off off off_ and Eren knew what he was thinking, because somehow all of their clothes came flying off.

Suddenly Eren's mouth was on his cock. 

"Shit!" Levi took a deep breath.  Eren was making  _disgusting slurping_  noises but it only made Levi groan, and the warmth around his dick was almost enough for him to cum, combined with the look Eren was giving him as he wrapped his tongue around and--shit, that look should be illegal. Including that  _thing_ Eren had just done with his tongue.

"Nnnn!" Levi's hand was fisted in Eren's hair when Eren deepthroated him and at the same time massaged his balls. "Stop,  Eren, I'm-aahh, I'm gonna cum-"

The other boy finally pulled away and leaned his forehead against Levi's, the desire in his eyes making Levi's mouth feel very dry. "Levi."

"Yeah," he panted. 

"I don't think I can stop after this."

Levi's hand made it's way onto his roommate's cock in answer.

Eren gasped and quickly found lube and a condom in a drawer. "Bed," he said, and suddenly Levi found himself sprawled on Eren's bed, with a naked Eren coming towards him with a glint in his eye.

He found himself blushing as he pulled Eren closer and rolled the condom over him. Eren attached his mouth to Levi's neck, who barely noticed a finger making it's way into his ass.

It was slightly uncomfortable, but he forced himself to relax. "Breathe," Eren murmered against his skin. "Levi..."

Levi closed his eyes and bit his lip as Eren's mouth breathed warm breaths onto his ear. His tongue was making dizzying circles , and Levi barely noticed when one finger became two, then three.

 "Come on," he finally gasped, biting at Eren's mouth. "Fuck me already."

 

Eren stopped, looking at him with a gaze of equal parts fondness and hot desire--before nipping at Levi's skin and moving to get the lube. 

Eren nuzzled Levi's neck before pushing slowly in.

 

Jesus.

 

Eren was filling him up--Levi was gasping,  biting his lip hard enough to draw blood--but suddenly Eren's mouth was on his and Levi whimpered.

 

"Levi," Eren mumbled into his mouth. "I'm all the way in."

 

Levi shivered. "Wait--Eren, hold on...a sec-"

 They lay there for a moment, Eren's hand fisting lazily into Levi's hair--until Levi moved his leg to kick at Eren. "Come on, come on-"

 

Eren was thrusting into him and Levi was seeing stars. Someone was making embarassing moans--wait, was that him?--and Eren was sucking at his neck; he was thrashing against the sheets, it was suddenly all too much and the pit of warmth deep in the pits of his stomach was becoming warmer, and warmer--he couldn't find the air to tell Eren, but the other boy must have known, and he reached down and took Levi's cock into his hand while simultaneously fucking him.

 

Levi came, and felt boneless as Eren came shortly after.

 

The other boy cupped Levi's face in his hands and kissed him before pulling out, and wrapping his arms around Levi.

 

Finally, Eren broke the comfortable silence., smiling against Levi's neck.

 

"Now that I've had your cock in my mouth, I guess we can talk about us, now."

 

Levi was drifting off to sleep, and was too tired to do anything but pull Eren closer.

 

\---

 

Epilogue

 

 

\---

 

 

God damn, Eren was a sex addict, Levi wrinkled his nose. His boyfriend (Hange had screamed "I called it!!" when the announcement was made, to the surprise of nobody) and he, had managed to make their way through a Costco pack of condoms in a week; the room smelled like sex all the time, and Levi was not sitting down ever again, ever.

 

"Do your damn laundry," he groused at Eren, who grumbled and nuzzled Levi's neck more. 

 

"Naaaw," Eren groaned. "I think we should go another round, might as well before laundry time-"

 

"You said this the last three times!"

 

"Ok fine fine, I've been caught, I just want my sheets to smell like you-"

 

Eren was going to kill him. Levi's heart was thumping hard at that statement, and he was melting at Eren's grin. Fine, maybe one more time wouldn't hurt--

 

\--Eren was definitely going to kill him.


End file.
